It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
