Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
