i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
