How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
