? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
