Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
