he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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