if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
