so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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