I'll bet she douches with gravy.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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