OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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