Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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