Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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