They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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