Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
