That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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