I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Nicole vs. Life
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
