$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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