haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize