are you so shy because you have an std?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Randomize
