He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize