If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
