Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
