were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
