i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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