Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
