I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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