On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
