What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
