Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Boobs are out for the taking
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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