$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
