I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
