No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
