Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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