he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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