i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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