Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
