VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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