If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
did you just send me my own nude
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
