you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
