Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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