I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
