I'm eating all of the evidence.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
