:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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