I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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