Dual....:-)
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
