I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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