did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
