Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
