why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she was so not down for the gang bang
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
